Jan Fran’s Redneck Yard

Besides watchin the grass grow in the backyard, rednecks do watch TV (sometimes it’s on the porch with an old TV) and we do like look’n at stuff on the internet. With those cable stations that run old shows and those fancy dancy videos on the internet, it’s even easier for a redneck to watch the ol redneck shows.

These shows are oft’n watched by us rednecks.

• The Grand Ole Opry-showcasing country music since 1925
• Hee Haw-weekly show where country musicians wore overalls were surrounded by hay bales.In the past, the television series,
• The Dukes Of Hazard -This series that revolved around 2 “good ol’ boys,” Bo and Luke, their uncle Jesse, and their cousin Daisy. Bo and Luke raced around raced around Hazard County, Georgia in their modified 1969 Dodge Charger, which they called “The General Lee.” They were always evading corrupt Boss Hogg and his inept county sheriff, Rosco P. Coltrane as they were on probation for illegal transportation of moonshine. A movie was based on this show.
  

Favorite redneck entertainers from the past:

• Hank Williams
• Grandpa Jones
  
• Jerry Clower
• Bob Ewell

These fellas are well known outside of redneck country. Just like the new up ‘n comin rednecks like these guys:

• Jeff Foxworthy-”you might be a redneck if…..”
• Ron White-“they call me Tater Salad”
  
• Bill Engvall-“Just a Guy”
• Larry The Cable Guy-“GIT-R-DONE”
• Blue Collar Comedy Tour
• Blue Collar TV
• King Of The Hill-modern, suburban family who lives in Arlen, Texas. They are continuously being called “rednecks” and “hillbillies” by their Laotian neighbor.

Redneck have bin provid’n fun and entertainment for years. It doesn’t matter if it’s rednecks like me, Jan Fran, JD, and Woody that might be a liv’n next door or rednecks who are famous folks on TV, doin movies, or concerts.

My cuzin Elly and I were a talk’n and discussin bein’ a redneck. I got her to write down about bein’ a redneck. Here’s what she wrote:

Being a redneck means a lot more than just being a country person. If you have ever met a true redneck you know that these people are very happy and caring. They also have a really good sense of humor. This is because they do not have a lot of money, so they have had to figure out creative ways to have fun without spending a lot of money. Redneck activities include NASCAR, hunting, fishing and working around their homes and in their yards. Redneck yards and redneck homes may not look liked they are worked on, but if you are observant you can find some very creative contraptions in a redneck yard and a redneck home.

A lot of people believe that rednecks only live in the country, but the truth is that they also live in urban areas and even in big cities. Of course, it is really easy to spot a redneck whenever you are in the city as they will be the ones who are wearing cowboy hats or trucker caps (which should never be confused with a baseball cap!). Rednecks honestly believe that being a redneck is a great honor, so you will not find them hiding who they really are at home or in the city.

There are some ways in which you can determine if you or someone else is a real redneck. One way is to do the “You might be a redneck if……” tests that Jeff Foxworthy has made so very famous. Here are a few:

You may be a redneck if……….

• You purchased a home that has a lot of grass that needs to be cut (and know it will stay that way after you move in)
  
• Absolutely have to have candy and moon pies in your house
• Have a cat that eats at the table
• When you take your dog for a walk both of you use the same tree
• Involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog

(Dang…..she sounds like me and JD. Maybe we sound like her…..I just don’t know! Sorry fer any repeatin’ on this. I’m going to blame it on the Pabst Blue  Ribbon Beer Ellie brought here to me. I bin drinkin it with my Jack !)
Me and Ellie do belive if there were more of us rednecks in the world it would be a better place. They’d be peace in the world cuz nobody could afford to fight fer long. Eventually good ‘ol Jack would kick in and there’d be some pass’n out eventually. We’d all be equal cuz instead of money being important, the things that are truly important in life (bass boats, the longest grass, and who’s turn it is to pick up the keg) would level out the classes.